Chapter One

 

Late September 1910 Captain Colin Limmerick stood by the gunnel of his vessel. The ship’s two steam pipes blew off excess as the one sail caught the chilled wind off the Irish Sea. He cranked away at the reel to bring in the latest catch. He put his bulging biceps to work as he pumped away at drawing the catch into the hold of the ship. The captain’s first mate, Eddy, stood behind him as he watched the tall, robust captain put his muscles to work. The fish made it into the hold, while the captain stared at the sea.

“Captain?” Eddy asked.

The captain gazed at the sea, as if he were in a trance. He winced with panic when he saw several people splashing about in the water. He reached for his bottle of whiskey, which sat on the planked floor of the deck. He took a few swigs and continued to stare. People squirmed and gasped for air as they slowly sank below the captivating waves. Their screams became less and less until only a few remained afloat.

“Captain? Are yaz feelin’ alright?” Eddy asked.

The last of the victims kept repeating the same phrase in Gaelic.

“Long live our Lord! And, long live Ireland.”

The captain bit his lip with horror as he watched each one of them sink into the frigid sea.

“Captain! Captain Colin! Are yaz feelin’ ill, or what?”

Colin turned to his first mate. “Oh, God!”

Eddy stepped closer to him. “What is it that ya see out there?”

Colin appeared horrified. “Oh, God! Sweet Christ!”  He took the whiskey bottle and placed it against his lips. He started to drink profusely, while he focused on Eddy. He gazed at his first mate with penetrating eyes. Eddy noticed a tear run down his captain’s cheek.

“Oh, sakes, Captain, yar cryin’? What’s wrong?” Eddy pulled the whiskey bottle from his captain’s hands. “Imagine a big strong man like yarself is cryin’. Ya got every wench chasin’ after yaz. The crew goes on about how much they wished they had yar good looks and brains. Can’t believe a man with so much to offer is cryin’.”

Colin looked at Eddy with his lips parted. He unbuttoned his jacket. He pulled his tartan scarf from his broad neck and unbuttoned his shirt. Eddy could see his bare chest and stomach.

“Look at me.”

Eddy noticed a deep scar on Colin’s belly.  “Oh, God! Captain, what happened?”

Colin examined his wound for the umpteenth time. He ran his large hands over bumpy aftermath of skin.

“What happened, ye ask, Ed? A sword did this to me.”

“Oh, good Lord. What kinda mess did yaz get yarself into? Since when ya play with swords?”

“Since lately, I suppose.”

“Are ya cryin’ ‘bout the wound, or are yaz in pain from it?”

“It does still cause me pain, so it does. Rosa stitched it up.”

“Rosa? She’s no medical doctor. Isn’t she an archeologist?”

“That she is, but there wasn’t a physician around. I’m not cryin’ ‘bout me wound, but tell me somethin’, Ed? Are there people drowin' in the sea just now?”

Eddy slowly turned his head. He squinted his eyes as he scanned the water.

“I’m not seein’ them, Captain.”

Colin turned to his first mate. “What ye mean?”

Eddy sighed with frustration. “I’m confiscatin’ yar whiskey. Ya really gotta cut down, don’t ya think?”

Colin buttoned his shirt. “Cut down? So, ye think I’m a lush, do ye?”

“Think? I know. We’s all gotta cut down, don’t ya think?”

Timmy in the wheelhouse climbed down to the deck to where his captain was talking to the first mate.

“Howye, Captain?”

Colin tipped his tweed cap at his crewmember. “Timmy.”

“Gotta message from me wench for ya, Captain.”

“How is Deidre these days?” Colin asked.

“She says she’s dyin’ to see yaz again, Captain. I think she’s in love with yaz.”

Eddy placed his hand on Timmy’s shoulder. “Be a good lad ‘n leave us be for now. Yar captain has run into a problem, eh?”

Timmy sprinted to the galley. Eddy chuckled.

“Kids today.”

Colin sat on the ledge of the deck. “I know ye don’t know what me work is like at the university, but…“

“Ya never tell me anythin’ ‘bout yar research. Yaz always been very secretive ‘bout it.”

“I’m a fishin’ captain and PhD candidate at the London University; strange combination, isn’t it? But ye know, Ed, I was the one with the high grades in school. Here I am a simple man, a fisherman at that. Yet I always had that crave for research and higher education. But I’ve noticed the other PhD candidates like Rosa came from wealth. Did ye know her father was a professor? Same with Amoli’s father.”

“Of course, Captain, those that go to university don’t come from workin’ class people like us, eh?” Eddy nudged Colin’s arm.

“So, why would I bore the first mate of me ship with me university bunk?”

“I’ve known yaz since ya was a wee lad on yar uncle’s ship. Nothin’ ya have ever said to me was ever borin’.”

“Yer too kind, Ed. Can ye give me back me whiskey bottle now?”

Eddy handed it back to his captain.

Colin took a few swigs. “Don’t want ye to repeat any of this.”

“Captain, ya know ya have me word.”

“I’ve been travelin’ to past times in history, so I have.”

Eddy grabbed Colin’s whiskey bottle and took a large gulp. “Time travel?”

“Aye.” Eddy took another gulp of whiskey. “Wanted to prove Megaloceros giganteous was sexually selected against 10,000 years ago, which led to its demise.”

“The Irish elk yar speakin’ of?”

“Deer, it was a deer.”

“Deer, elk, what’s the difference?”

“I was away from the ship earlier this year, remember?”

“Of course.”

“I was in 840 AD helpin’ the ancient Celts battle the Vikings.”

“Oh, sweet Jesus,” Eddy’s eyes bounced around showing his nervous twitch. “Lord love ya, yar speakin’ gibberish are yaz?”

“It’s time travel, is what it is, if ye can believe what I’m tellin’ yez?”

“Time travel?”

“I battled Viking warriors everyday. I even battled the head Chieftain of the Celts for Amoli.”

“Amoli was there?”

“Aye. He wanted her for his own. Geez, I had to get her back, Ed.”

“When did ya learn to use a sword?”

“Dr. Sasha Dimitrikov taught me in five feckin’ minutes.”

“Dr. Dimitrikov taught yaz? Sasha? He’s an expert?”

“He learned in Russia, so he did. He’s quite a skilled swordsman, I must say.”

“Really? Yar pretty swift with a bow ‘n arrow, though.”

Colin took back his bottle of whiskey and drank it down to the last drop.

“Didn’t notice a whole lot of archery when I was there, mate.”

“Maybe archery wasn’t invented yet.”

“Donno, really. So, that’s me story, Ed. Ye now know all of me secrets.”

“Yer a wonder of the world, captain. Time travel, imagine that.”

“I’ve traveled to prehistoric time periods as well. I’ve seen prehistoric mammals, even Neanderthal.”

“A cave man?”

“Sure, if ye wanna address ‘im as that.”

Eddy sat on the ledge by the gunnel beside his Captain.

“Captain, are you gonna time travel again?”

“I hope not. I’m plannin’ a weddin’. I’m gettin’ married on Christmas day.”

“To Amoli, the little foreign lass from India? She’s a beauty, that one. Nice ass on her, I must say.” Colin grinned. “Glad to hear yar finally tyin’ the knot. It’s about time.”

“Sunday, I’ve got to get back to London a tad earlier than usual. Get the boys workin’ on the catch for Sunday night, okay?”

“Aye, Captain.”

 

Chapter Two

 

It was a brisk autumn day. Colin sat on the bench outside on the campus grounds of London University. He put on his glasses and began to read a book. Rosa walked by and noticed him.

“Good morning. What are you doing here so bright and early on a Monday?”

He placed the book on his lap and tipped his bowler hat to her.

“Howye, love? Yer lookin’ as beautiful as ever.”

She sat beside him. “Where’s Sasha these days?”

“Received a letter from him the other day. He’s not in Russia anymore, love.”

Her eyebrows lowered close to her eyes. “Where is he?”

“He’s in Geneva for a conference.”

“Geneva? Conference? Is he that important?”

Colin chuckled. “Apparently, he is.”

“For what?”

“He’s teamed up with a group of Russian mathematicians ‘n physicists, because they’ve been tryin’ to develop a time machine, no doubt.”

Rosa stood up to face Colin. “Time machine?”

“Aye, love.”

“We closed the pathway through time. Our mission was accomplished. His time travel device led us to these unthinkable times in history. Why does he feel he has to create a time machine?”

“Donno. He’s always callin’ me the crazy one. Maybe he should look in a mirror.”

“Do you need to venture back in time again?”

“I should hope not. I’m finished with all that. We’re also hopin’ we closed the pathway. Sasha did indicate that only time would tell.”

“Well, I can’t imagine with all that work we did that the pathway wasn’t closed. Just can’t imagine.”

“Sasha should be back within the next few days. He’s a busy man, apparently.”

“Well, I suppose he is.”

“Just by readin’ his letters it didn’t seem like he spent much time in Russia. Donno if his wife came with him to Geneva. Likely not, I assume.”

“Oh, yes, his wife.” She grimaced. “I almost forgot that he’s married.”

Colin took her hand. “A lovely wench like yerself should find yerself a nice gent, don’t ye think? Don’t waste yer time on Sasha.”

“I’m not wasting my time on Sasha. I’m wasting my time on you.”

He paused. “I see.”

“I still think there’s hope for us.” Her eyebrows lifted.

He sighed with frustration. “Love, I’m marryin’ Amoli on Christmas day. Me mind is made up.”

“You’ve broken your engagement to her before, you can do it again.”

“Ye don’t want me, ye just think ye do.”

Her delicate hands slid under his jacket and felt around for his chest.

“Yes, I do. I’d marry you right here and now.”

“Ye wouldn’t, ye can’t seem to get past who I am.”

“I know exactly who you are, Colin Limmerick.”

“Ye don’t. I’m a drunken fisherman whose only real experience with wenches is with whores. Ye have a hard time with that, I know. But now I have Amoli; she’s changed everythin’ for me, so she has.”

“Yes, Amoli has brought you the happiness I could never give you.”

“Ye can’t deal with me past ‘n Amoli can.”

“My only problem is with Lorelei. I don’t like her.”

“She’s always upon me ship, so she is. Ye’d have to get used to her if ye ‘n me was a couple again, I mean.” Colin rubbed his large rough hands over his face. “Why are we even havin’ this conversation? I’m gonna marry Amoli this Christmas.”

“No, you’re not.”

He placed his hands on her shoulders. “Love, why ye doin’ this?”

“You love me and I love you, so what’s the problem?”

“Yer tolerance level of a drunken sea captain like me is very low, that’s the problem.”

“When you finally complete your PhD dissertation, will you remain in London?”

“Don’t think I would. I’ve invested too many years in me ship.”

“So, Amoli would live with you on the Atlantic Mermaid?”

“She may.”

Rosa tore away from him with her hands in the air. “Rubbish!”

“Amoli accepts me, ye don’t.”

“She’s a fool.”

“That’s obvious, because she’s chosen me.”

Rosa paced. “Sasha still hasn’t mentioned his wife to me. Can you believe that?”

“Of course. I urged him to tell ye, but he must’ve backed down.”

“What a swine he is.”

She sat tightly beside him on the bench. He turned to her and ran his finger under her chin.

“Love, don’t go chasin’ rainbows.”

She folded her arms. “He lied to me, Colin.”

He pulled his watch from his vest pocket. “I’ve really got to keep an eye on the time. I’ve got to see Professor Cushing in a few.”

“Is he finally going to sign off on your dissertation?”

“Likely, not.”

“You’ve polished that paper with utter perfection. Is he refusing to sign off?”

“He left me a brief note. It didn’t appear too positive. He never did fancy me research on Megaloceros giganteous.”

“How absurd. I thought the chancellor was going to fix things between you and Dr. Cushing.”

“She also left a note. Apparently, she’s cross with me.”

“Oh, my, Colin, I told you not to get mixed up with her. She’s the chancellor of the university. She has the power.”

He stared into Rosa’s eyes and bit his lip. “I’ll be seein’ her later today in her office.”

“It’s always later, isn’t it?” Rosa stood up. “If she has champagne ready I’d refuse it.” He smiled. “Colin, if you want champagne so badly buy it yourself.”

He stood up and bent over to kiss her on the lips. She blushed.

“Gotta run, so I do.”

She grinned at him. He smiled back and walked off. Shortly Colin found himself at Professor Cushing’s office door at the university. He gave a slight knock.

“Yes?”

“Sar, it’s me.”

“Ah, yes, Colin, do enter. I’ve been meaning to chat with you.”

Colin took a deep breath and stepped inside his professor’s office.

“There’s nowhere to sit, sar.”

“That’s right. That old stool of mine finally gave out. Timothy Duncan was sitting on it at the time.”

Professor Cushing hacked with laughter and then suddenly wore a serious expression on his face.

“Better him than me. I’m much bigger, which means I’d fall much harder.”

“Did you know Timothy has a scheduled defense date for his dissertation?” Colin leaned against the wall and removed his hat and jacket. “If you think you are even close to your defense date you better think again.” Colin turned to the wall to concentrate on a spider that tried to blend in with the chipping paint. “What do you think about that?”

Colin appeared startled as his concentration on the spider was interrupted.

“What, sar?”

“I am simply saying that you are not close at all to your oral examination.”

“Janey mac, well, well,” Colin blurted, with a sigh.

Professor Cushing lifted his eyebrows. “Is that all you have to say?”

“Let me guess, yer unhappy ‘cause I didn’t include a chapter on yer horseshoe crab?”

“Yes! Colin, you are correct!”

“Well, at least I’m right ‘bout somethin’.”

“You see, the entire idea of gaining acceptance into the doctorate program basically means that you are to work under the direction of an academic advisor. You are supposed to do what your academic advisor, meaning me, tells you.”

Colin sighed as he repositioned himself against the wall.

“Bollocks this is! Ye don’t appear very well versed in evolution at all, sar. I was matched with yez ‘cause ye was supposed to be an expert.”

Dr. Cushing leered at Colin. “How dare you speak to me in that tone! I should have refused you from day one. You’re nothing but an underclass Irish peasant.”

Colin placed his hat on his head and recklessly put on his coat. He violently swooped his arm along Dr. Cushing’s desk and pushed his belongings onto the floor with a crash. Dr. Cushing jumped up.

“This is so menacing of you! How dare you!”

Colin stood back from the mess on the floor.

“Yer lucky I didn’t do this to ye.”

Colin primped his coat and hat and stepped out of the office. Later that afternoon Colin sat in his university office going over student papers.

“So, Limmerick, I heard what you did to poor Dr. Cushing. This could cost you your doctorate,” Timothy Duncan said, poking his head through the door.

Colin stared at him from behind a wood desk. “Good news travels fast, ye little wanker.”

“You are definitely out of control. You’re like a wild man.”

“So I am,” Colin said, placing his glasses on his face. “Would ye mind closin’ the door? I‘ve got loads to do just now.”

“Only God could help you now.” Colin removed his reading glasses and grinned. Timothy felt someone from behind push him into Colin’s office. “I beg your pardon?”

“Get out of my way. You like fly on wall, you are pest, da?” Sasha Dimitrikov said, barging his way into Colin’s office.

“Sasha! Good to see yez, mate!” Colin said, with a smile.

Sasha pulled up a chair and made himself comfortable.

“I come sooner than letter say, because I miss my Miss Rosa.”

Colin stared at Timothy. Timothy stared back at Colin.

“Oh, I suppose I should be leaving,” Timothy said, timidly.

Colin chuckled as Timothy exited. “Finally, the fool left.”

“I not like him; he is stupid.”

“How was Geneva?”

Sasha pulled out a cigarette from his jacket.

“I will say you; but first, I must smoke.”

“I can’t wait for ye to finish yer bloody fag. Just tell me about the conference.”

“Mr. Limmerick, you so impatient. Are you ready?” Sasha searched his jacket for a match. He found one and lit the fresh cigarette in his mouth. “Ready?”

“What happened in Geneva?”

“Me with great Russian scientists created time machine.”

“So, ye said in the letter.”

“Oh. I say you already?” Colin grinned at him and scratched his head. “It will take you to past and maybe future. You want future next time?”

Colin laughed. “Me? Next time?”

“Da.”

“What would I do with the future?”

“How far you want to go? You want 1914? You want 1939? You want 2014?”

“Nay, there’s just nothin’ I need with those years.”

“You would meet your children’s children, Mr. Limmerick.”

“I just want Cushing out of me hair, is all.”

“Dr. Cushing bad man. I will send him to year 2025, da?”

Colin chuckled. “Would ye stop, Sasha?”

“Mr. Limmerick, I will be most famous scientist in all world.”

“What ye sayin’ here, man? What ye meanin’ by famous?”

“I will charge fee and take all people to chosen time in past. I will be rich!”

Colin shut his eyes. “Mate, ye wanna take passengers, is that what yer implyin’?”

Sasha grinned at him. “Passengers? Da, that is what I will do.”

“Yer a fine feck, aren’t yez? Ye can’t bloody well be takin’ passengers on this time machine of yers? Are ye mad? Yer time machine isn’t a carousel ride at the fair.”

Sasha grinned as if he had gone mad. “Better than carousel can ever be. I will do it. I will be most famous man in world. You will still be on your boat fishing for mackerel.”

“Don’t care if I get old ‘n croak at sea, mate. Ye just can’t be takin’ people’s money so ye can put them into life-threatenin’ situations.”

Sasha searched his jacket for another cigarette. “What is life-threatening?”

“Time travel is.”

“It is only life-threatening if you get into fight with Neanderthals, head chieftain’s of ancient Celtic clans, and try to irritate prehistoric monsters.”

Colin rolled his eyes. “Oh, Mother of God, help this man.”

“I am honest man and I will make honest money.”

Colin stood up from his desk. “Nay, yer not.”

Sasha’s smile dissipated. “Not what?”

Colin walked around his desk and fondled his keys. “Yer not honest.” Colin grabbed his coat off the coat rack. “Ye don’t know the meanin’ of the word.”

“Where ye going?”

“I’ve got to see the chancellor, but I’ll definitely make sure Rosa knows what yer intensions are. Sometimes ye can stoop low, mate, very low.”

A muster of tobacco smoke filled the room. “You not tell Rosa. I not feel like her silly woman lecture.”

“Get out of me office. I’ll tell her ‘n she’ll definitely give ye one of her lectures. Yer such a shite sometimes,” Colin said, as he slipped on his jacket.

Sasha casually smoked his cigarette. “You kick me out?”

Colin sighed. “I’m not. I’ve gotta be somewhere just now.”

Sasha sprung up from his chair. “You jealous.”

He strutted out of the office. Colin rolled his eyes back and blurted a faint chuckle. He scurried out of the building and crossed the street. He wrapped his tartan scarf around his neck.

“What’s the hurry, big boy?” Colin turned his head to see Rosa there in a long blue coat wearing a hat with a blue feather. “Where are you rushing off to?”

“I think I need to see the chancellor.”

“Oh, Colin, I told you to keep your distance from her. From what you told me she sounds dangerous.”

Colin smiled and fiddled with his scarf. “Things aren’t going well with Professor Cushing.”

“When have things gone right with Professor Cushing?”

“Never.”

“She hasn’t done anything regarding your situation with your advisor, has she?”

“Ye meanin’ Evelyn? She funded our last time travel expedition, did she not?”

Rosa shifted her eyes. “Yes, of course, but she hasn’t made any attempt to place you with a different advisor.”

“Well, I was just going to her office to demand a different advisor. I can no longer work with that shite.” He took Rosa’s hand and held it tightly. “Wish me luck.”

As he stepped away from her, she tugged at his jacket sleeve.

“Do not accept anymore champagne or food from this woman. She’s the chancellor of the university.”

“Ye must think I’m a child?”

“Colin Limmerick, I know how you are when you’re offered fine alcohol.”

He grinned at her. “Love, I’ll see ye later, hmm?”

He broke from her and walked off. He crossed several streets and made it to the chancellor’s office. A receptionist sat at the front of a typewriter. Colin removed his bowler hat and gave a slight bow.

“Would Chancellor Evelyn Gordon be up to seein’ me for a bit?”  Colin asked with a forced smile.

“She’s busy.”

Colin’s eyes scanned the room.  He continuously put his weight on one foot, then changing to the next foot.  “I have an appointment.”

     “I see you do have an appointment.”

“Can ye tell her Colin is here to see her?”

“I don’t know if I could interrupt her now. She’s in a meeting with one of the deans.”

“I see. Well, if ye get a chance, could ye try to let her know I’m here?”

“I’ll see what I can do.”

Colin stepped back and sat in the waiting room. The dean exited the office and Colin perked up in his seat. The receptionist entered the chancellor’s office and then entered the waiting room.

“She says she will see you now.”

Colin smiled as he sprung up from his seat to pace into the Chancellor’s office.

“Evelyn, forgive me, I hope I’m not disturbin’ ye.”

She was watering her plants. “Enter, Colin. I wanted to have a chat with you.” He entered her office with his hat in his hand and his jacket draped over his arm. “Please sit a bit. I was just minding my rhododendrons. They’re not looking their best, I’m afraid.”

“Shouldn’t they be planted in yer garden outside?”

“Oh, yes, you could be correct about that. They really don’t care for my office.” Colin tapped his foot and she noticed. “Are you nervous about something? Shall I order some champagne?”

He stood up. “I don’t need champagne at this hour, if ye don’t mind me sayin’?”

“You? Refusing champagne? Something very serious must be on your mind.”

“I can refuse a drink when offered to me,” he said, as he loosened his tie.

“No, you can’t.”

He stared at the floor. “I can.”

She peered at him. “What’s bothering you?” she asked, as she continued to fuss over her plants.

“I initially came to ye with a complaint about me academic advisor. I spoke to the dean and he wasted me time. He suggested I bring this to yer attention.”

She fluttered around her office and finally decided to sit at her desk.

“And, your point is?”

“Me point is he’s still me academic advisor.”

She placed the end of a pencil in her mouth. “A big strong handsome man like yourself can’t deal with your pesky academic advisor?  Boohoo, Colin.”

“He strongly dislikes me for reasons that have nothin’ to do with me research or me academic writin’.”

“Oh, really? Well, allow me to elaborate. Dr. Cushing came to see me the other day. And he wanted to know if you and I are, you know, involved, if you can imagine?” She kept the pencil in her mouth and sucked on it. “What do you think, Colin?” She stood up and stepped very close to where he was sitting. “I know you want me right here and now. I’m all too sure that you would make whoopee with me right here in this office.”

His eyes bounced around the room. “Evelyn, please. Don’t do this.”

She eased herself onto his lap and linked her arms tightly around his neck.

“Kiss me.”

“I don’t think we should do this anymore. It isn’t right; yer the chancellor of the university. Dr. Cushing suspects us.”

“I visualize you in my bed every night and I’m sure you do the same about me.” She pressed her lips against his. “You used to thrust yourself into me, in and out, in and out. You are very creative in bed. I want to feel your big hard muscles again.”

He tried to pry her off of him. “I wish ye the very best, but I wasn’t attached to anyone when we had those few times together. Now, I am someone’s suitor.”

She slid off his lap. “Suitor? You’re someone else’s suitor? How dare you?”

“I’m sorry, Evelyn.”

She stepped away from him. “Oh, my! How stupid of me to allow myself to get taken in by your manhood!”

His eyes widened. “Evelyn?”

“You are such a brute!”

“I thanked ye profusely for the fundin’, but I’m goin’ after payin’ ye back. I should be able to have the money to ye by early next week.”

“I don’t want your Irish money!”

His lips parted as he took his time to respond. “Nothin’ wrong with,” his eyes shifted, “acceptin’ Irish money, nothin’ wrong with that. I think it’s the least I can do, don’t ye think?”

“You’re somebody else’s suitor? Who is she? You’ve been unfaithful to me.”

“Unfaithful? ”

“You believe your own lies. You’re just awful. How dare you take advantage of me? You just wanted me for my body, you big brute!”

He sighed. “Oh, sweet Christ, that’s not it at all.” She sat behind her desk and pulled a pink hanky from her drawer so she could cry in it. “Evelyn, please don’t cry. I never wanted to hurt ye. Forgive me.”

“You robbed me of my true essence, you brute.”

He stood on the other end of her desk with an awkward expression on his face.

“Can I do anythin’ to make it up to ye?”

She stopped sobbing. “Yes, there is something you can do.”

“Tell me ‘n I’ll do anythin’.”

“Lets engage in some serious hanky-panky right here on my desk.”

He stepped closer to her. “Evelyn, I can’t do that, I’m sorry.”

“I didn’t tell you the despicable situation you put me in, did I?”

His eyebrows lifted. “Situation? How ye mean?”

She continued to cry in her handkerchief. “Oh, dear lord, what will I do? My life is ruined. Colin,” she sniffled, and tried to catch her breath. “I think I’m expecting your child.”

He stepped back and tried to sit down in the chair, but he missed it and fell to the floor. She sprung up from her chair and raced to his side. “Let me help you. You’re the father of our child.”

He tried to hoist his bulked physique up from the floor, but he failed every time. He looked at her.

“Evelyn, how do ye know yer expectin’?”

“I haven’t received my monthlies in a few, now.”

“Forgive me rudeness, but we do have to consider that yer 59 years old.”

She stood up. “Oh, so it bothers you that I’m older than you?”

“It never bothered me. Yer a very attractive wench, but I think when a wench reaches her late fifties she would usually lose her monthlies, don’t ye think?”

She had a stern expression on her face. “Are you calling me old?”

He was starting to sweat  -- droplets of water fell from his forehead.

“Old?  Not at all. But all wenches experience a biological change when they pass age 50, is all I’m sayin’ to ye.”

“Perhaps, but isn’t it all too interesting to know that I have never missed my monthlies and now that you have stepped into my life I am now missing them. I should hope that you won’t be a coward like some men and leave me alone to raise our child.”

“I wouldn’t do that.”

“So, then, I suppose we have to wed.”

His eyes followed her as she paced. He turned his body on his hands and knees and used a chair to prop himself up from the floor.

“Forgive me for this sudden upset.”

“You and I would make a great team, Colin,” she said, as she fiddled with her plants again.

He brushed some dust off his jacket. “Team?”

“Is that too strange of a thought?”

“Ye don’t wanna team up with me. I’m Irish ‘n that would surely become bothersome to ye.”

She scurried over to him. “No, I didn’t mean what I said before. I like it that you’re Irish.”

“Don’t matter, really. I think I’ve got to be pushin’ onward, don’t ye think?”

She tugged onto his arm. “I know a quaint little place where we can go and have a bite.”

He pulled away from her. “Please stop this! Dr. Cushing already suspects us. I’ll be asked to leave this university before ye know it, ‘n there goes me academic career.” He recklessly got hold of the doorknob and flung the door open. “I really must run, now.”

She watched him exit her office.