Later on, sometime just before midnight, after Bug went back home, I found myself watching a group of young men shooting off their own personal fireworks into the night sky. 

To be honest it was kind of fun to watch the sparkles of light flashing up into the darkened sky only to look back down to earth and see the sweat glazed flesh of their owners patting down their chests with their damp t-shirts. Hey, I may be fighting something that can kill me, but I’m far from being that dead yet.

“Hey… You, beautiful!” one of the guys  yelled, noticing my stare, forcing me to look away as I blushed, I knew he had caught me gawking at him from just a few feet away. 

“Liz… how, how are you doing,” the young man asked, as he ran up to me. 

“Damn it,” I thought as he approached me, it had been so long since I allowed myself to feel like woman.  I could feel the beating of my heart increasing with each step he took, closing in on me as more of his lush, young body came to view.

“Hey… it’s me remember?” he asked walking right up to me, invading my personal space, his body mere inches from me as he put his sweat damped t-shirt back on, covering the sharp curves of his chest from my view, I could smell the sweetness of his flesh pouring over me. –damn so hot, I thought.

“It’s me, Mark from High School, do you remember me?” he asked. His dark chocolate eyes gazing deeply into my own, locking me in a deep gaze as I found it hard to breathe let alone speak.

“Hey… I heard about your… your canc…,” he said as I interrupted.

 “Mark, the skateboarder dude from Art class right?” I asked, “You were a freshman when I graduated, always sat in the back of the class ogling the skimpy dressed cheerleaders, trying to see their panties whenever they bent down to pull up their socks” I said, images of his face flashing through my memories.

“Yeah… that was me, but I found cheerleader type to be a waste of my time,” he said, rolling the tip of his tongue over the contour of his lips, moistening them. 

“Really?” I said playfully, catching myself off guard, wondering why the hell I had said it in such a high-pitched girly way.

“Yeah…” he said, smiling, “I find the dark gothic chicks more to my liking now,” he hissed, licking his lips with the tip of his tongue, his eyes giving me the once over before he continued.

 Anyway,” he said, cupping his hands into mine, “I’m glad to see your fighting it, it’s great to see you still around.” He whispered before lightly, gently pressing his soft velvet lips against my cheek, kissing me gently before pushing away. 

“Say Mark,” I whispered deeply, gazing intensely into his dark chocolate eyes, a feeling I had long forgotten sparking inside me. 

“Sorry,” he sighed, I… I didn’t mean anything by it.” He breathed deeply, looking away from me for a moment before looking back, a small rose-colored hue, masking across his face. 

“Just… just glad to see you still… around,” Mark gasped as something inside me snapped and I suddenly rushed him.  Pressing my lips over his, roping my arms tightly around his body.

It had been so long since I felt a man’s soft, tangy lips pressing over my own, so long since I felt the warmth of man’s body pressing against me, felt the sensual, safe, and carnal embrace that only a man and a woman could share between each other. 

“What… what the hell Liz,” Mark gasped braking away from my lips as I firmly held him against me, grinding my hips into his. 

“I just… I just need to remember how it feels to be a desired again,” I gasped, pressing my lips back into his, running the tips of my fingers down his back as his friends shot off their fireworks, filling the night sky with bright colored sparks. 

“I… I just want to be loved again,” I said, pushing away from him, rolling my lips of the contour of my lips, taking in the sweet sugary flavor of his lips into my mouth before walking away. 

“Thanks Mark!” I said.  Walking back home, feeling his gaze upon as I stepped inside. To be honest, I don’t know what came over me in that moment.  What possessed me to do what I did, to kiss a man I only knew in passing so many years ago. 

But so too it felt… it felt wonderful to hear his words of care, of concern for me instead of the whine I heard a few days before.  Great to hear those words I dreamt to hear from others, for so long. 

Words I wanted to know, to hear, to feel from my family, my mom and dad, from Kash… words that would let me know that there were still those that loved me, that cared for me and remembered, that I was still breathing, still fighting for each last breath.  Still living to feel, to experience, to love each moment as if it were my last.